Written in the so-called “stream-of-consciousness” style. Sort of.
Also I apologize for this post looking like a clown vomited Skittles on it.
I think there’s an alarm clock under my butt, but I’m not sure…oh my god my roommate can probably hear my alarm going off I don’t want to piss her off what do I do? BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP WHERE THE HELL IS THAT CLOCK I can’t find it…Maybe if I get out of bed and look for it I’ll find it, but I don’t want to get out of bed…Oh, pillow, pillow, how do I love thee, you are so soft and gentle and the cushion for my troubles…BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP Goddammit that STUPID alarm! Oh here I feel it, turn OFF turn OFF turn OFF you stupid alarm clock…Maybe if I just smash it with my fist it’ll stop. That seemed to do the trick, oh wait was that a battery I heard flying across the room? Why is there a pencil jabbing into my neck…oh god what time is it? Let me look at the clock…HEY WHO BROKE THE ALARM CLOCK I’LL KILL YA My roommate is rustling in protest! I’ve pissed her off! I must jump out of bed like it was part of the plan all along Out of bed now…Don’t look in the mirror don’t look in the mirror don’t look in the mirror don’t look in the mirror OH GOD I looked in the mirror who is that hideous creature from hell? Must get in the shower must get in the shower How much sleep did I get last night? Not enough that’s for sure…never watching that many Rhett and Link videos again…Good Mythical Morning…Hey, GOOD MYTHICAL MORNING! Maybe they have a new episode out! Let me run back to bed with my laptop…NO NO NO Shower first, Rhett and Link later…Okay, out of the shower now…but oh my god my hair is wet and I really don’t want to dry my hair…I’m hungry but I don’t want to get food I’m thirsty but I don’t want to drink I just want to sleep…sleep…sleep…YAAWWN Just a few more minutes…I’ll close my eyes for a few more minutes…OH MY GOD WHAT TIME IS IT Goddammit! I only have ten minutes to get to class Haven’t dried my hair, haven’t brushed my teeth I’m screwed I’m going to be late, so late, so, so, so late….I have no time to eat or drink or think. Ever. My roommate already left for class. Gotta grab my books do I have the right notebook? Where are my keys WHERE ARE MY KEYS WHERE ARE MY GODDAMN KEYS I JUST HAD THEM A FEW SECONDS AGO Oh my god where’s my phone? oh there it is! Hey someone followed me on Twitter! SOMEONE FOLLOWED ME ON TWITTER! SOMEONE. FOLLOWED. ME. ON. TWITTER. Jesus damn class…throw phone into backpack, grab book I didn’t read…run out door, oh my god I’m going to be so so late POWER WALK POWER WALK POWER WALK MORNING, I HAVE CONQUERED THEE. I HAVE MADE YOU MY SLAVE. NOW WHERE ARE…? OH HELL. I LEFT MY KEYS AGAIN WHY DO I EXIST WHY DOES THIS WORLD EXIST when’s the afternoon?